Don't start no shit there won't be no shit...

I fucking love girl talk.

1234..5 and barely alive

Maybe it was becuse i'd been drinking the two days before but my trip to shoreditch's 1234 festival seemed doomed from the start. After getting to liverpool st an hour and half before my friends and then being asked why 'i wasn't performing' by a frail old tube regular, not having the heart to tell her i was merely sitting on the floor, i cracked some swine flu realted joke and moved places. Indeed things were not going well.

However my doubts were unfounded musically it was sick, patrick wolf being my personal highlight and the rain even held off until about 7. My only complaint was feeling distinctly out of place with my genuine accent, lack of deck shoes and haircut with the sides intact when confronted with the 10,000 art school kids in attendance. hmmmm i was in shoreditch so i cant really complain.

personal highlight



peas

Guess her muff?

I recently came to realise my life is currently unbelievably boring, for the past week all I've done is laze around the house,drink and spend unhealthy amounts of time on websites like this
and this trying to persuade myself that all my friends are probably far more bored in full time work. I think this basically stems from me a) currently having no bike and b) living back at my parents for the summer. two great boredom inducers.

at least things are looking up, I've got the 12hr party of 1234 festival in shoreditch this Sunday, Rom jam the week after and then boardmasters so perhaps life is about to get interesting again.

peas

Spreicken du banan!

Cologne was amazing, thought i'd share a few photos with the masses sorry if its a little low on riding but in truth far more fruh and jager snitzel went down than any riding, on our part anyway. Unfortunately there's no photos from the now infamous hard rock party as me and a few others were a little busy trying to escape a certain german crack whore whilst englands finest ambassadors were doing their thing. In fact despite all of us entering i dont think any of us rode for more than a couple of hours throughout the whole weekend, partly cause of the rain and cause of the group hangovers which didn't shift till late afternoon every day.

Anyways i digress heres some photos mostly from the hostel each morning these are my personal favouraites.





















Oh and i should probably add that the photos were all taken by our dear furry photographic friend Ross Penny whose photos you can find here and all manner of other places, probably flickr if your feeling brave.

Anyways, ill throw some more random stories from what was honestly the single funniest weekend of my life out there when i can be bothered.

Aufweidersain or something like that.

Giving england a bad name?

http://rideukbmx.com/news/english-thugs-worlds.html

Oh dear naughty naughty English bmxers, but really a blame list? besides all the boys on the list are legends and i often think the reason basingstoke and essex bmxers get along so well is cause we equal each other on the crunk o meter.

Stokie and essex stand up

same time next year?

peas.

Journey music

In an attempt to make stanstead airport more bearable I've downloaded approximately 2 million albums, off rapidshare. These are my two standouts from the cream of summer 2009. both fresh and so so good,ok the latter isn't an album its an ep, but if its purpose was to generate excitement for his second album it certainly worked on me.

peasss.

Its that time of year again...

When half of the UK's riding population migrates to Cologne for the masters/worlds I'm honestly the most excited I've been since i went to Estonia. I also find it slightly ironic that in the past year, I've seen more of the world than in my previous 17 years despite being the poorest I've ever been, i must be doing something right i guess?

cologne and Am street awaits me.

peas.

Not sure what to make of this?

The riding is definitely rad as to be expected, as is the filming i just think that it kinda feels like a Nike advert rather than a chilled web edit.I may be stating the obvious here but it just seems like something you would see for Thierry Henry or Tiger Woods? Other than that its pretty rad and the apprenticeship is clearly deserved.

peas

Snappers.

Said badass jackets

This thing was amazing i think it was like a jet enginge or something it had a foosball table inside surronded by douchebags who played forever, i just wanted a quick spin to go with my pint.
We visisted stonehenge on the way, i have to say its probably the most overated landmark in the world, i personally prefer glastonburys stone circle a mere few hundred thousand years younger. In reflection of how boring stonehenge is we got out the car long enough for american tourists to take this photo and left.
Nats country estate.
Before the storm literally and metophorically.

At the height of my sun/ lidl brand vodka induced illness.

My 'friends' laughing at my horrifically burned legs, im trapped with the skin of a pale ginger child depite the fact i have dark hair.

The price of a 'free' ticket.

My favouraite club in all the world 'drag strip'

Festival toilets provide a suprising amount of entertainment.

our camp pre me puking just about everywhere.

The loooong journey home.


The devil is wicker and plays a violin?

I think most of these photos were either taken by fellow glastonburyers Marcus and Tom, i wouldnt try and claim them the fact most feature me ruins this idea. Ill develop mine in the distant future when i have money.

peas

If your bored enough......

and want to know what you missed read on.

Q:Where can you get unbelievably messy,meet most of Britain's overlooked psychiatric referrals, have a whole meal inside a Yorkshire pudding and be part of a 'British cultural treasure' which everyone who didn't go pretends is rubbish.

A:Glastonbury (and as I'm having a Friday night to forget, i may as well write a little bit about what i experienced in my seven days there)

As i lack both the patience and motivation to write paragraphs or anything decent ill divide it into high points and low points kinda like a gcse history lesson.




Low points(ill get these out the way first so by the end you'll have forgotten what a whiny adolescent blog this clearly is)

1.Spending the whole of Tuesday hungover in inescapable sun, the result being 'two face effect sunburn' from lying on my side.(note to self, in future don't try and out drink girls who aren't actually drinking.bitch.)

2. Seeing Neil Young/Brand new possibly the two most boring, pretentious sets I've ever watched, both performed by men old enough to know better(i realise I'm gonna catch some shit for that statement, i mean Neil young did write a boring anti war album after all right?). I actually like Brand new but the fact they played at 1pm and didn't play anything of deja entendu made it boring for me, maybe i was just in a bad mood.

3.Fornicating with a girl possibly a little too young for me, ehrrrm.


4. Our 11pm to 7am shift for oxfam, i have to admit that whilst walking half naked through country lanes in torrential rain at 7am i began to have my doubts. These were sorted by the prospect of a free ticket.

5.The rain

6.Ed, the forty something pyschopath who came and sat round our fire one night, he was extremely annoying,very possibly a sex offender and camped alone next to us- needless to say we all slept with an eye on the tent doorway.

7. Pissing up peoples legs much to the annoyance of the crowd during prodigy, i had to go and if people had stood still and not panicked i would have had it gushing harmlessly into the mud.


8. The fact everything in the oxfam camp was vegan/vegetarian option, i have no problem with this usually but everything was raannnnk( bannana and falafel,really?).

9. The communal showers in oxfam camp, i saw far too many things and dropping my shower gel was a harrowing moment. Also the fact i forgot to take a towel meant yesterdays tshirt was the alternative needless to say i got dressed wet most mornings.


That's all the negativity i have to spout now for the good'uns

a)Our badass jackets bought 3 for a £2 from some sick sick shop.

b) getting to see most of the festival despite actually being there to work for oxfam.

c)The fact everyone thinks the 'stone circle' (made in 1990) is some ancient sun worshipping spot, which leads to it being the place everyone ends their night/goes to get mashed as the sun comes up.

d) the Yorkshire pudding which contained pees mash and A STEAK AND GUINNESS PIE, if heaven could be derived from a meal i think ive found it.

e) the 'drag strip'- vampire girls tearing each others clothes off whilst suspended from the ceiling, girls in bunny suits dry fucking each other and an amazing ebony bones set. what better way to spend the hours 1-3AM?

f)Everything in trash city/shangrilah

G)... is for Glasvegas amaaaazing.

h) hearing random drivers singing along to Bon Iver as we played it in the long long traffic jams in Salisbury, definately the best acoustic gig I've ever seen.

i)Staying at Nat's sweet house in somerset, it was like something out of the famous five complete with chickens and an attic hide out, i can't thank her and her lovely mother enough.

i could go on but my minds blank for now and I'm kinda at that half awake half asleep phase of the evening, so i really can't be bothered

photos to follow.

peas.

Dislocation, relocation?

Just saw this on streetphire, I'm always into what aversion are doing those guys seem to have the right ideas about chilling and riding. Anyways I'm not really into trails( due to the fact I'm waffa cakes at them) but i thought this video was pretty rad, and its featuring fellow plymouth term time local Ryan Keen, the boy is a tad silly but we love him all the same. get well soon bro

A Fun Weekend from Ollie Wainwright on Vimeo.

peas.